Some days you smile at all the people you pass. I have days like that all the time; days where I even add a "hello" or "good morning" with a big toothy smile.
And some days you swear in public. These days are less frequent for me, in fact very seldom. (I do not include road rage because, let's be honest, I swear about 70 times a day while driving, some people are just fucking douche-bags and there is no other way around it.) I don't mean positive, conversation-enhancement swearing either, like "abso-fucking-lutely" "this is fucking awesome!" "no fucking way!" Obviously using phrases like that in public makes you cooler and fucking awesome.
I am talking about an entirely different type of swear, a moment that comes with the word. There should be a separate name for these occasions. When I let one of these babies out, I don't want it to simply be called swearing. I want it to be called something that sounds offensive. Something so great that you could say "I'm going to ________," and everyone would gasp and cover their ears. The term needs to capture not only the spoken swear, but also all of the rage, anger, and emotion that goes into it. How about--and I'm just suggesting this as a possibility--sweardurkunt? When you get angry you could scream "I'm going to sweardurkunt all of you!" Simply saying the word feels liberating, it sounds German and inherently angry in a wonderful combination of offensive syllables.
So next time your eyes pop, your voice cracks, and you lose all of your vocabulary, except for the bad words and random words that somehow connect to a thought, raise your voice and sweardurkunt. And if someone tells you to calm down, just tell them to "shut the fuck up" because you are sweadurkunting.
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